There's no place like home

Michele Bachmann’s got her name in the newspapers again! This happens very easily: go on the wingnut’s radio show, get asked “what’s the reaction” in Minnesota to the fact that the state has an “openly” Muslim congressman (Keith Ellison) who knows Muslim people (Barack Obama?), and argue that the liberal media is not concerned enough about this very obvious terrorism, what with the Flying Imams and stuff who probably all know Ellison from Muslim parties and Al Qaeda.

By KEVIN DIAZ, Star Tribune

Rep. Michele Bachmann, appearing Tuesday night on Fox News' show with Sean Hannity and Alan Colmes, dismissed as an "urban legend" reports that she had suggested on a preelection cable show with MSNBC's Chris Matthews that then-Sen. Barack Obama and other members of Congress may be "anti-American" and that the media should investigate them as such.

Bachmann also accused Democratic Senate candidate Al Franken of trying to "stuff the ballot box" in his Minnesota recount struggle with GOP incumbent Norm Coleman.

It has become a cliche of modern political life that Republicans “play the game” so much better than Democrats. This is code for saying that Democrats have pesky things like souls and consciences that make it impossible for them to stand in front of audiences and tell bald-faced lies about their opponents.

Surely you noticed that there was almost nothing in the way of personal attacks during the entirety of the Democratic convention. Why do you suppose that is? Do you think that Democratic strategists just aren't aware that negative campaigning, especially at the national level, is nearly always effective? Or do you think it's because they find it genuinely distasteful to attack people with the requisite ferocity? That when given the opportunity to address a large fraction of the country they prefer to point to the policy failures of their opponents and to explain what they would do differently given the chance?

Ever wonder why there is no liberal equivalent to Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity or Glenn Beck? It's because normal, mentally healthy people are incapable of the sorts of things that they do. Most people are not capable of sustaining the anger and dishonesty required to engage in hours a day of sustained attack. Most people care at least a little bit about getting their facts straight before holding forth on television or radio. Only brain-dead fanatics are capable of that sort of extreme simple-mindedness. To find that on the left you have to shoot right past liberal into the realms of the extreme left-wing, where you will not find anyone with either an ounce of power, or an ounce of loyalty to the Democratic party. The crazy right-wing is fanatically loyal to the Republican party. The extreme left votes for Nader and gives lectures about how there is only the Republicrat party.

The Republicans think nothing of pitting one part of the country against another. John Kerry was from Massachussetts. As far as Republicans were concerned, that was a legitimate issue against him. The Northeast is a shadowy place full of people of shady values, the sort who don't put their country first and sneer at people who do. They are perfectly happy to use a major American city (that would be San Francisco) as a bogeyman for scaring people into line. Can you imagine any Democrat, regardless of the electoral map, talking about Kansas or Oklahoma in such terms?

Early voting in Texas started on Tuesday. The genius of early voting is that it’s convenient. You can usually vote at any polling place in your county, instead of having to make sure you’re going to the right one. Which makes it simple to vote during your lunch hour or at the grocery store on the way home from work, etc. Great idea, right? I think so. I’ve always enjoyed it.

Unfortunately, it appears that the system is rigged so that convenient polling places are only available to some people, which changes the demographics of who actually votes. Surprise surprise, one of the targets of such abuse is a historically black university outside of Houston called Prairie View A&M. Their county is only providing two voting machines, and they are located away from the university, so voting is convenient for townies, but not the students. The students, who have been victimized by this sort of disenfranchisement tactic before, decided to stage a protest.

> Too bad you decided not to impeach him.

Hey, I didn't "decide not to impeach him" my motherfucking cocksucking spineless toadying representatives did.

I sent those motherfuckers emails and told them to impeach. I signed petitions telling those cocksuckers to impeach.

And did it do any goddamn good? Fuck no!

And can I, personally, start impeachment hearings? Fuck no!

Can you tell I'm pissed off? I sure hope I don't have to be pissed off all the time at the next president, but I'm not going to hold my breath.

And if McCain ends up the next president you can watch the news for me. I'm sure I'll have a stroke driving in my car and screaming at the goddamn cocksucking motherfuckers on the radio.

Fuck it, I'm moving to Mars.

Hey, I didn't "decide not to impeach him" my maternal-procreating male chicken oral pressure-intake(ing) ( adv.) and expelling spineless toadying representatives did.

I sent those maternal fertilizers (adj.) emails and told them to impeach. I signed petitions telling those Foghorn Leghorn orifice pleasurers to impeach.

And did it do any dog-gone (adj.) good? Sexual Intercourse no!

And can I, personally, start impeachment hearings? Sexual Intercourse no!

Can you tell I'm urinated (adj. or v.) off? I sure hope I don't have to be catheterized (v.) all the time at the next president, but I'm not going to hold my breath.

And if McCain ends up the next president you can watch the news for me. I'm sure I'll have a stroke driving in my car and screaming at the dog-darn (adj.) Sanders-munching, implanters of seed into those whom have been previously pregnant (ed.) on the radio.

Impale it sexually and fervently, I'm moving to Mars.